As my sweet friend pointed out, I have been given a gift in my mother coming to live with us. We have always grieved for the family we left behind, when we moved up here. My children never really got to know their uncles, cousins, etc, and they never got to have that special bond with their grandparents. Now they can really develop a relationship and memories that they will always cherish.
This happened yesterday after church. Their father showed up to drop off some gifts for the girls, and whether an accident or not, he was still there when we arrived, and it freaked out the girls because they didn't want a scene. Well, he left without a word, and it seemed like it was a crisis averted.
When we got home, they opened the presents with mom and I watching, at which point Laura made one of her usual angry comments about her dad, and Grace took her to task about it. For a good 30 minutes they had a very heated discussion, which has needed to take place for a while. They didn't come to any agreement, but I believe they understood what they were each trying to convey. I was only called in for interpretation once, and when they were done, my mom said a few words to Laura.
Afterward, the girls helped move in the two new couches we got from some friends, and were being their normal goofy selves. I felt very proud, to see that they could communicate such intense feelings, not totally agree on things, and then continue being the best friends they are. I must have done a few things right in the middle of all of the chaos of our lives with Jeff. But that is not the best part......
My mom and I had lunch at Baker's Square today, and talked about the whole thing. My mom got this sweet expression on her face, and told me that because the girls had that argument with her right there in the middle of everything...she finally felt like she was part of a family again! Her eyes had a twinkle in them, and I was again amazed at how easily we have all adjusted to her being in our home. You are right, Paula, I have been given a wonderful gift!
I am going to make some gift tags now....being crafty and out of my slump! HO HO HO!
Finding Faith again :-)
YAY! How wonderful when family can be "real enough" to honestly BE family! So proud of the person you've become/are becoming! (Can I say that without sounding condescending?) You know what I mean...
ReplyDeleteAn adjustment from "attitude" to "gratitude" usually changes everything. At least, it has in MY life!
Say it Sistah!!! Yeah, Spence was just saying that we should think about going to Al-Anon meetings again, and I agree with him. There are too many loved ones in our lives that we get sucked into when we're not "working our program" with our co-dependant issues!!
ReplyDeleteI went faithfully for 12 years, and have taken a break for the last three. I still live my life with the help of a lot of the tools I learned there, but this last year has taken it's toll and it seems to all be coming out these last few weeks...YUK!! As my favorite SNL character, Stuart Smalley would say, "Too much STINKIN' THINKIN'!"
I never commented on your idea about meeting half way, or going to an Altered Art retreat...but how cool would that be!!! Have you heard of any in WI, or IA, that is somewhat half way between us??